Do you feel guilty for saying no?

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Hi, lovelies!! How are you doing? I hope you are doing well wherever you are. I want to say thank you for always supporting me and making time to read my blogs.

Have you ever felt guilty for saying no to your family or friends? Because I did. I was a people pleaser before so, I still remember the first time I said no firmly to my friend and later, cried about it. I was lucky at that time because my friend who I rejected the offer to hang out was very understanding. Now, I'm not fully saying I get over it completely but, I am definitely learning to set my boundaries and stick with it.


So, why do we feel guilty for saying no? Here are some of the reasons:


1) People-pleasing tendencies:

  • They have a deep need for approval and may feel guilty when they decline requests because of the fear of rejection.
  • This can be due to what happened in the past during childhood or other traumatic events

2) Fear of conflict:

  • Saying no can sometimes lead to disagreements or uncomfortable conversations, causing people to avoid confrontation by saying yes even when they don't want to. 

3) Low self-esteem:

  • When disagreements happen, they will overthink how other people perceive them after this. In other words, they don't want to seem like "a bad person" because their worth is likely determined by how people view them. 

4) Cultural expectations:

  • Certain cultures may prioritize the importance of community over oneself which can lead to guilt feelings when saying no. 

So, how can we stop feeling guilty when all we do is voicing our needs? First is to affirm ourselves that it's okay to prioritize our well-being and say no when necessary. 




Second, set boundaries by stating what you are willing to do or compromise and stick to them. Then, focus on the bright side where saying no can allow you more time for yourself and prevent burnout. Lastly, seek support if needed.


I hope this topic will be helpful to you. What I share with all of you is also what I learned and a reminder to myself.




We'll meet again next time. Take care 🤗

Borahae 💜💜💜


Love, Shy 💞

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